Wedding Rings & Investor Meetings

Ladies, do you wear your wedding ring when meeting investors?

It’s 2019 and that this is even a question grates on my nerves. Why should marital status matter when fundraising for your business? It matters because despite the rise in women-led companies, despite more women taking on C-level roles, despite the Sheryl Sandbergs of the world encouraging young women to get into tech, we are still relegated to marital and parental status.

Come on, really?

Yes, really. This is still happening.

Shouldn’t Business Be Market-Driven?

In a perfect world, business would be solely market-driven, regardless of which gender is at the helm. Many studies have been done on this touchy subject and they bring different conclusions.

In my opinion, it has to do with psychology. Men are typically seen as more serious and authoritative, whereas women are seen as emotional and less business-oriented. Women are expected to be feminine and dependent on men for things, not for bringing game-changing technologies to the world.

The 2 Witchsy co-founders know this well. These women were having a difficult time securing investment for their startup, with patronizing comments and emails starting with “okay, girls”. So they created a fictional male co-founder whom they named Keith. It made a huge difference in their interactions with people. They saw improved communication and response time when “Keith” handled things.

Maybe It’s Your Bling

Case in point: a recent MarketWatch op-ed piece was published, talking about how gender and ethnic diversity benefits companies. The writer mentioned a fragrance company executive who was questioned by an investor about her ability to balance her professional and personal lives. She wasn’t asked these kinds of questions at a different meeting and suddenly noticed that she’d forgotten to wear her wedding ring. That made the difference.

On the personal side, I had a business meeting a mere 2 months ago where I was asked if I had children. I was taken aback because it didn’t seem to be a part of the I-just-want-to-get-to-know-you series of questions. I answered with a sarcastic “Yes, would you like to take one of them off my back?”. This was followed with a “How do you expect to balance motherhood and work?”.

Newsflash to that guy: it’s 2019 and women can be wives, mothers, and business professionals. I guess he never got the memo, so I sent him a copy.

If you’re a man reading this, how often have you been asked “How do you expect to balance fatherhood and your business?”.

I’m guessing zero.

On or Off?

I was asked by a friend who read the MarketWatch article if I’ve ever considered taking off my wedding ring when I meet with investors. I answered an emphatic NO.

I said this for 3 reasons:

1. Investment is typically a long-term relationship between investor and entrepreneur. I’m not interested in hiding anything that is (happily) so much a part of me as my marital status. Even if I wanted to hide it, a quick online search would found me out, anyway.

2. If I have to hide who I am about something that is so vital to my life, what does that say about me as a business leader? How can I expect to lead a successful company and inspire my team to do great things when I have to pretend to be something I’m not in the hopes of securing investment?

3. From a more practical standpoint, diversity is in. Like BIG time. Most people don’t want to be seen as not supporting women, women of color, members of the LBGTQ community, and such.

If someone won’t invest in my company because I’m a wife and mother, then they aren’t the right investor for me.

My wedding ring is staying on.